Wednesday, March 26, 2008

so I meet you at the cemetry gates

Last night was Smith's night at Danny's and it felt good to throw caution to the wind and stay up late dancing to smart lyrics waaay past the hour that I should have been tight asleep. Maybe I won't ever decide to fully accept this grown up bull-shit. I'm always going to get frustrated about people giving me the run around.

Speaking of run around I lost my wallet ... AGAIN. I know it's really ridiculous. This time, I don't think it's coming back, probably due to hubris. I didn't really care about the money (three duckets) or the cards, but I got all whiny and bothered when I realized I couldn't get on the train to go and see S.

Last Unicorn: Well I have the confirmation code and the tickets are already paid for so that's okay right?
Amtrak Man: Yes, you can pick up your tickets ... you have to have a photo id though.
Last Unicorn: That's the thing, I don't have one. Lost wallet. That was it all my photo identification ... gone.
Amtrak Man: Well if you have your birth certificate and two forms of non-photo id...
Last Unicorn: So three forms of non-photo identification?
Amtrak Man: No .... well, yes.
Last Unicorn: I think I have my birth certificate, isn't that enough?
Amtrak Man: No. Since 911 no one can get on a train without a photo id or the birth certificate and two forms of non-photo id.
Last Unicorn: (my tone increasingly more whiny and panic-y) Really? I mean I don't think I have any thing else. There is no way to call ahead or anything ....
Amtrak Man: Do you want me to cancel your tickets?
Last Unicorn: NO! I really miss my boyfriend. I'm not a terrorist and I have the confirmation code that only I can access... I have to take that train! I hate 911.

Long Pause

Amtrak Man: I'm really sorry. I wish I could get you on that train miss, really I do.
Last Unicorn: (defeated tone) Thank you, sorry for yelling at you. This has been a long day.
Amtrak Man: It's only 10 a.m.
Last Unicorn: I know, ha ha, well thanks for your help. Maybe I'll forge something ... kidding.

Luckily when I got home I found a passport, college id (I guess I had doubles), and a blockbuster card. Crisis averted. Ladies and gentleman keep your photo and non-photo identification close to your heart, you are terrorist without it! All of this phone conversation ensued whilst my little sister who was visiting watched. I really try to set a good example for her and I felt pretty embarassed about the way I handled the situation. After I got off the phone I gave her the "that's not a really good way to handle those situations talk" but she just laughed at me. Then I laughed at myself. I laughed at myself even harder when I had to flash my passport at Danny's to get into the bar. I felt like a hokey secret agent.

It's getting warmer out and I am slowly coming out of my grumpy winter semi-hibernation state. I would like to publicly apologize to everyone for being a crabby crab apple tree crab face. Please forgive me for being anti-social and neglectful. I want to be friends and I want to go on adventures. Hey lets ride bikes and go to Myopic books! Let's get italian ice and make incendiary zines.

I'm no good to anyone in the winter. Next year I need to figure out a better way to manage my cold-war blues. Let's all cross our fingers for sunshine and hope for rain drops instead of snow flakes, we still have a little way to go before dress weather!

Waking up from a loooong cold winter.


Chris said...

THIS IS CHRIS! (tory's friend)

The Last Unicorn said...

Hello Tory's friend! Welcome to my bloggity blog. Also, don't forget about JoyYee I'm serious! I owe you.